What Prayer Can Do, Pt. 4

During our prayer time at 8:10 every morning at Keystone, I have been praying that we be able to get all our work done efficiently, so we are able to leave at a decent time. There is no question about it, God has been answering that prayer. I actually left work early today! I haven't been able to do that in months! I still have more hours logged in than I should for this week so far, but it was encouraging.

And this evening I had the time and energy to start my sermon for Sunday. For most pastors, just starting on Wednesday is a bad thing. For me lately, with all the overtime, this is a wonderful improvement! For the past couple months I was getting home around 9 pm, and was too tired to do much of anything. Sermon work had to wait until Saturday.

I am not sure if the 5 people I am praying blessings for are getting the blessings or not. But I have gotten an indication that at least one of those prayers is being answered. And one of our CAYA people has said she is seeing definite results. It is so exciting to see God work!

I have also noticed an increase in spiritual warfare as well. I don't want to go into specifics here, but it is real. The good news is, Jesus already won the victory! I refuse to give up, or give in.

Let's See What Prayer Can Do...Pt.

We are still praying at Keystone every morning at 8:10. It is a challenge just getting people together, because several of us have already been there for a while and are involved in work. But people are coming and praying, and it is exciting to me. What are the results? I'm not sure yet, it is still early on in this process. I do know my own attitude has improved. And I know that what I feared most during this week - trying to keep up with Joe's stuff while he was on vacation - is going better than I expected. I have to thank God for that, as well as Tracy!

There have been a couple awkward moments. Because we are all so busy, I try to keep the prayer time very brief. So, what happens when there is a customer in shipping and receiving, or like today, one of the bosses is there talking to staff? I have pressed on, praying with those who could participate anyway. Waiting is a bad idea, I can't keep people standing around for 15 minutes before we start. We all have obligations to get to. It's taking more boldness than I really feel I have to do this, but God is helping me.

As far as the personal prayer challenge we started at CAYA 2 weeks ago - to pray for a blessing for 5 people for 5 minutes a day - that one has had a dramatic effect on me, in two areas. One, I had let myself get so self-absorbed during this time of stress that my prayer life almost died. I am once again praying, maybe more than I ever have before. And the prayers are more full of faith, praise, and love, because I am not just whining to God about how wrong everything is.

Another amazing effect is forgiveness. Part of the challenge was that one of these 5 people be someone that hurt us. I have been praying for someone who hurt me deeply a few years ago. I have been asking that God be closer to her than ever before, that she experience true joy, peace and love in His presence. I don't know if that is happening for her or not, but it has certainly changed how I feel when I think of her. There is no more pain or fear or resentment. Only a desire for her to be loved by God. There is no question about it - prayer works!

The 3 of the other 4 people I am praying for seem to be struggling more than they are being blessed. I feel like they are caught in the middle of a battle between me and the enemy. But I know God is going to answer these prayers, He will bring blessings in His time. After all, it is only week 2.

Let's See What Prayer Can Do, Part 2

Deuteronomy 31:8 NLT
"Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord will personally go ahead of you. He will be with you; he will neither fail you nor abandon you.""

I will admit to feeling discouraged. I know I shouldn't. The promises of God are true, but often we have to struggle through hard times first. The prayer is helping I know, but at the same time things feel so very, very wrong.

I am rather amazed that I have had the courage to ask people to pray - even those who don't go to my church. Every morning at 8:10 we are having a brief prayer for help, mercy, and for attitudes and relationships. We have only done it since Monday, and that day I limited it to just CAYA people. Tuesday, I reached out a bit more. Yesterday I asked everyone except the upstairs people and Volatiles - because poor Volatiles people can't come into our area. People are actually coming to pray. I don't know if it is just politeness, curiosity, or if they really do want to pray. I hope it is the latter. But the question burning in my mind is, what will the results be?

If things get worse instead of better, will those I am hoping to reach with the gospel end up discouraged and turning from God? If things get worse only for me, but better for unbelievers, am I willing to make that sacrifice? I don't know how much endurance I have. It ebbs and flows. Right now, I have little left.

Yesterday was a long, hard battle with samples that were completely unpredictable despite the histories we have on them. I had to run about 40 of them over again. And most of this was because they were so dirty they were completely messing up my baseline. I should have been done with the run by 5 pm. Instead I was there until 8, nursing along my struggling instrument and trying to get results within range. I felt a sense of victory getting them all done and reported, but it wore me out.

Today went well as far as samples go, but I can't do much now until Joe is done with the distillation rack. He has tons of ammonia by titration samples to distill, and I have a handful of low level ammonias I have to distill and read on the probe. For me to do my stuff would keep him from doing what he has to do, so I'm home now, and will go back in at 5 pm, after Joe is done. It will mean a late night, but it also gives me a much appreciated break in the middle of a frustrating day.

It was frustrating because my son got hurt. He has made it known for a while that he is wanting to work at Keystone full time. Many people have told his boss that he does great work, that we need him full time. Yet he is only being scheduled part time. This morning, when Joe and I had to wash our own glassware because Scott is only working part time, and wasn't there yet today, I mentioned this to Jeff. He said he would talk to Scott's boss. An hour later, a 16 year old boy was in the dish room with Scott, being trained by him.

I suppose more help is good, and I appreciate a company that is willing to give kids a job - those are hard to find. He is the son of a family friend of my boss, and it is a very kind and generous thing for him to let this boy work here for the summer. But this hurt Scott. He does great work, and needs a full time job. Nobody has told him anything about another part time worker. They won't guarantee that he will get more hours - or even the same level of hours he has been getting. Just a short while ago, his boss told him that he had gotten complaints about his work - which is so very untrue it still makes me angry every time I think about it. In short, they are giving him no sense of security, and giving the impression that they don't care if he stays or leaves.

I know full well that when we enter into spiritual battle, things get tough. They can get personal. The problems at my workplace are not just human problems, but spiritual. The human problems of being overworked, under appreciated, and treated with disrespect are real. But the bigger issues are the spiritual problems of selfishness, pride, anger, bitterness, and perhaps greed.

We who are Christians are being beaten down with intense stress to the point where we have all but abandoned our call to reach the world. All we want to do is survive. And sometimes we find that we are not surviving well at all, but instead are falling far short of the Christlike behavior we should have. I am the worst of all, and I am ashamed. There are people in the lab who do not know Jesus, and who are surely not impressed by the complaining, bitterness, and anger that is so common.

The thing is, this battle is not just about our preferences, our comfort, or our job satisfaction. It really is about lost souls. And the enemy is taking us out by destroying our peace and joy. We are now fighting the battle with prayer, every morning. My attitude had been better all week - until this happened with Scott.

Why does this have such a profound effect on me? Because my son is one of the souls I'm fighting for. All through my ministry, it has seemed that the enemy attacks my kids, and frankly I am sick of it! This is my boy! He is off limits!

He deserves respect, he needs to know his value. I fear that he will feel abandoned and betrayed not only by his boss, but ultimately by God. More than anything else in this world, I want my children, my own flesh and blood, to know the love of God. I can't bear the thought of spending a lifetime trying to build the kingdom of God, only to see my own kids on the outside.

I know that God had great plans for Joseph, but first he had to be sold into slavery. I know Daniel had to face the lion's den. I know that so often, God has amazing plans that are only fulfilled by first going through what seems like disaster. And so...I am going to hold on. I will hold on for my own sake, and for my son's sake. I will hold on for all the souls at Keystone who do not have a relationship with Jesus. I have a very weak grip right now though, so I am trusting that God is also holding on to me.

Let's See What Prayer Can Do, Part 1

On Sunday I presented a prayer challenge to the church. I passed out small booklets, and asked them to write down 5 names - one of them being someone that has hurt them. Then they are to pray for a blessing for those people for 5 minutes every day, for 5 weeks. Also, I asked them to add the name of one person that we can lead to the Lord. In 5 weeks we will see what God has done. It is a simple thing, but it can also seem silly, or like a gimmick. That is not my intent. What I want is for all of us - myself above all - to stop looking at ourselves and our own circumstances, and to focus on others. I want to live God's word that commands that we love our enemies, and pray for them. And I want the blessings I pray for these people to be blessings that will not benefit me directly, or may in fact cost me.

Chosing the names was difficult, because there are so many more than 5 people I want to be blessed. But I think God brought the right names to the list. I will admit selfishly, I hope at least one person put my name on their list!

Also, starting Monday morning, we began praying before work, asking for help, strength, peace, better attitudes and for relationships in the midst of the stress. Monday it was just CAYA people and Joe. Today, I invited others. We didn't have everyone join us, but it was good to see several people who don't go to church regularly pray. I look forward to seeing what happens through all this.

I am doing better both emotionally and spiritually. Getting back on track with my daily devotions has helped. I am doing my best to lower stress by keeping up with housework so I don't feel overwhelmed when I come home. I bought good groceries - the first time in over 2 months - so my diet is better. I also am getting some exercise. Keith's truck broke down only one short month after we bought it, and we can't afford to replace it right now. So I got a bike. I am riding to and from work twice a day, and I have to admit, I feel better after only a few days of doing it. I still am work ing too many hours, but I have hope of surviving now.

While home sick on Friday, I begged God for relief, for some kind of answer. His answer was brief: Hold on. I don't know if I am holding on until something changes, or until a better job comes along. But this I know - I have to hold on. I have been on the edge of wanting to chuck it all and storm off in a fit. I can't do that, because I will lose more than just a job. I have to hold on, and I have to do it in a way that is pleasing to God.

We are told to do all things without complaining or arguing. Yet that is all I have been doing. I have been sinning, because my selfish desires were not being met. It may be true that these desires are reasonable and in fact necessary. I do need time with my family. I do need time to work on my sermons. I do need time to rest, to cook healthy meals, and just have a life. I do need the deadlines that are threatening to drown me to let up a bit. But complaining all the time and being angry about it is not fixing it. I want to believe my boss cares and is going to do something to help. I am not sure if he even realizes how bad it is. Maybe he does but there is nothing he can do about it yet. I don't know. But I'm going to be praying for my own attitude. I want to please God in all I say and do. My boss is not Jeff King. My boss is God, I want to do my best for Him even if it seems like it is too much for me.

The stress of the deadlines is the biggest problem. It presents a temptation that can be nearly irresistable. Last night, around 9 pm, I realized that though I had 11 cyanide samples on my batch, I only had results for 10. I missed a sample. I will confess with shame that I was seriously tempted to fudge a result for that last sample and turn it in. But instead I chose to please God, to have integrity. I figured out which sample was missed, and took the two and a half hours necessary to run it so I had valid results. It may not seem like much to any honest person. But I'm not that honest. I am a sinner who feels overwhelmed, and very much wanted to take the easy way out in order to lighten the load. Only God's gentle nudge kept me honest this morning.

I have been less critical and angry as well. I won't say I've been perfect. I'm still frustrated by the situation and terrified of what will happen next week when Joe goes on vacation. Tracy is learning some of his stuff to pick up the slack and I'm so very grateful for that. But there is still a chance that I'm going to be completely overwhelmed next week. I need a miracle from God before then. I need Him to completely change how I think, how I react. I need to stop thinking about what I want and how I feel and instead just hold on, as He told me to do. I need to hold on to His love, His presence, His strength, and His promise. This time will end. I just have to hold on.

Online Mentors

Lately, as I have been trying to learn how to be a church planter, I have connected with many potential mentors. There are pastors/leaders I follow on Twitter who post regular blogs with leadership skills. There are church planter organizations that send me newsletters with articles that attempt to teach me how to reach the lost and be a better pastor. There are even some that are constantly trying to sell me books or other resources that surely will make all the difference in our weekly attendance and giving levels. And I am discovering that I'm getting burned out on them.

It's not that anything they are saying or doing is bad. They have great points to make, many of them learned the hard way. I think the reality of my reaction right now is twofold.

1. Most of them are pastors of hundreds, not a dozen. The things they talk about may apply to me someday, or they may apply to me on a lesser scale, but over all we dwell in completely different universes. I don't need to hear how to motivate the masses, or how to corral huge movements. I work in a secular job with about half of my congregation. We are constantly interacting. They see my behavior in real life on a daily basis, and apparently they approve enough to allow me to lead this church. What I crave from these mentors is to know how to hear the voice of God, and how to see Him come meet with our group of 12 in such a powerful way that the room shakes. Don't teach me how to be a better leader or a better speaker. Teach me to know God better!

2. Some of what I am reading is starting to feel like gimmicks. I know this is not the case with most of these men, because I see their character and know that they have proven their mettle. They are trying to take their experiences, many learned the hard way, and teach those of us who follow with simple, easy to remember lists. Their intentions are pure. But in part because of the volume of such posts available and in part because of my natural desire to look for formulas and shortcuts, I find myself looking not for the principles behind the words, but a clear-cut path to success.

It is #2 that scares me.

I suspect this is why Jesus didn't give the disciples - or us - a list of 10 Ways to Be Fishers of Men. Instead He told them to be fishers of men, and then modeled that in His daily life. It is harder to find the "how-to" this way, but it is best. We read the stories of how Jesus was a fisher of souls, and look for how we can do the same today in our context. Most of the time, this takes a lot of thought and prayer. It would be easier to have a checklist of things to do or not to do, but each situation calls for a unique approach.

I do appreciate the many blogs and lessons posted by my online mentors, and I will likely continue to read them. But my reason for reading them has changed. Instead of looking for keys that will help me grow my church, I will be reading them for things that will challenge my character. God will take care of my church, and it will grow or not grow in His will and in His timing.

My attitudes, desires, and my complete submission to God are within my control though. And as I follow those who have gone before, I will depend on their lessons to show me the subtle traps that can allow sin to get in the way of my mission.

And as for those who are constantly trying to sell me something that will produce an instant 20% increase in giving, or 10% more visitors next Sunday - forget it! Devotion to God can't be bought in a program. I'll stick to making disciples the slow and dangerous way.

Cortisone shot

Today I got an epidural cortisone shot for my herniated disk. I started the day with a visit to the doctor. He was really nice. When he learned I was a pastor, he asked me if I get my sermons from the internet. I assured him that I do not - I go straight to the Source! I do use the internet as a research tool, though.

After it was determined that I would indeed have the shot today, I had an hour and a half to wait. I went to the Grinnell hospital to visit a man in my congregation who is a patient, then went with my husband to Hardee's so he could have lunch.

I didn't have to wait too long once I checked in at the hospital. I will admit that time passed more quickly thanks to my new iPad and an episode of NCIS. I didn't have quite enough time to finish the episode before I was taken back to the OR.

The procedure itself went amazingly fast. I laid on my stomach, and the doctor marked the spot on my back. He set up the C arm for the X-ray machine, then numbed that part of my back. That stung a bit, but it wasn't bad. A minute or two later and he began the injection. It took about a minute to get to the right place and inject the steroid. I knew when it was injected because I got an intense headache as it rushed up my spine.

By then it was done. The headache faded a bit as I stood up. I walked myself back to the recovery area, and it was all finished.

I had orders to lay on a bag of frozen peas once I got home. I've been doing that all afternoon and evening, and I have to say I'd make a terrible princess. There were no mattresses between me and the pea, and still I was able to nap just fine! However the headache has gotten steadily worse throughout the evening, and there is a nasty aching feeling from the point of the injection down to my toes. I'm sure it will be better by morning, but sleep may be a difficult thing tonight.

I just read this article while preparing for my Sunday sermon, from the Enhanced Strong's Lexicon:

907 βαπτίζω [baptizo /bap·tid·zo/] verb.1 to dip repeatedly, to immerse, to submerge (of vessels sunk). 2 to cleanse by dipping or submerging, to wash, to make clean with water, to wash one’s self, bathe. 3 to overwhelm. Additional Information: Not to be confused with 911, bapto. The clearest example that shows the meaning of baptizo is a text from the Greek poet and physician Nicander, who lived about 200 B.C. It is a recipe for making pickles and is helpful because it uses both words. Nicander says that in order to make a pickle, the vegetable should first be ‘dipped’ (bapto) into boiling water and then ‘baptised’ (baptizo) in the vinegar solution. Both verbs concern the immersing of vegetables in a solution. But the first is temporary. The second, the act of baptising the vegetable, produces a permanent change.When used in the New Testament, this word more often refers to our union and identification with Christ than to our water baptism. e.g. Mark 16:16. ‘He that believes and is baptised shall be saved’. Christ is saying that mere intellectual assent is not enough. There must be a union with him, a real change, like the vegetable to the pickle! (Bible Study Magazine, James Montgomery Boice, May 1989.)

That is an awesome illustration! Our baptism as Christians has two parts. The first is a water baptism. According to Paul, our baptism unites us with Christ. Some believe that we are actually saved by the act of baptism. I believe the Bible makes it clear that we are saved by faith alone, not works. Therefore, the act of baptism cannot save us.

Others believe that water baptism is a symbol, an outward declaration that we are now believers in Christ. It is symbolic of being cleansed, washed of our sins. I believe this is true. However, I think there is more to this ritual.

The Jews were part of God's chosen people by birth, but each individual (males, anyway), had to enter into that covenant in a formal way.

A covenant is a very serious agreement between two parties, that can never be broken. There are covenants between peers, and a Suzerian covenant that is between a lord or master, and a peasant. In that covenant, the master offers all the benefits, and the peasant offers undying loyalty. There is a ceremony sealing that covenant.

God made such a covenant with Abraham. Part of the ceremonial sealing of this agreement was circumcision. It was a vital part of the drama, and the covenant was not complete without it.

Through Jesus, we have a covenant with God. He makes us His children, and offers us eternal life. We seal that covenant through the act of baptism.

The second part of our baptism is being filled with the Holy Spirit. Jesus told the disciples in Acts 1:4b-5: “Do not leave Jerusalem until the Father sends you the gift he promised, as I told you before. John baptized with water, but in just a few days you will be baptized with the Holy Spirit.”

I have been pondering the meaning of baptism, and why being filled with the Holy Spirit is called baptism by Jesus. Of course there is the idea that water baptism symbolizes being washed, and the Holy Spirit actually makes us clean on the inside. We are promised that God will actually change our hearts in several places in the Old Testament, including this passage from Ezekiel 11:19-20: ^"And I will give them singleness of heart and put a new spirit within them. I will take away their stony, stubborn heart and give them a tender, responsive heart, so they will obey my decrees and regulations. Then they will truly be my people, and I will be their God."

But there is another aspect to this baptism that this article I quoted at the beginning helped me to understand.

In water baptism, we are dipped, like the vegetable that is being pickled is dipped into the boiling water. Of course our baptism is permanent, not needing to be repeated. But we can't stay in the water. We may have died to self, but we still have to live! Besides, our toes would get all wrinkled if this water baptism was a constant experience.

But when we are baptized with the Holy Spirit, we are to remain in Him. He is to fill us, and we are to remain filled. Of course there are times when that filling is made new again, refreshed in a sense. But should the Spirit ever leave us, we are in deep trouble.

So Lord, pickle me! I don't mean make me sour! I mean, fill me with Your Holy Spirit, and let it be forever!

Miracles do happen, and healing from abuse is possible! I may have experienced the greatest evidence of this in my own life just last night. The treatment for colitis is bringing up some very traumatic memories. The typical pattern is that when this issue resurfaces, I have nightmares, and often even flashbacks. I'm into day 4 so far, and this hasn't happened.This is a huge step in healing for me.

In fact, I had a pretty amazing dream last night. I woke up about 3:30 (due to minor pain, not as bad as it has been.) I was dreaming when I woke up. I can't remember the context of this dream, but I was saying again and again "Yeshua Hamashiach." This was pretty incredible, because it is not a name I'm familiar with. I know the name Yeshua very well. It is Jesus in Hebrew. But though I have heard Hamashiach before, and I know that it is His title Messiah or Christ, it is not a word that I claim to know. In fact, it took several hours of hard thinking and an internet search before I could even remember what the name was!

This is an amazing sign of recovery. I'm facing one of my most violent, humiliating memories, and instead of having nightmares and flashbacks, I wake up from a dream where I'm praising my Savior - even when I'm in the middle of an attack of pain! It just isn't possible to doubt that Jesus does miracles, and that healing is possible, when things like this happens.

This week, with the pain I've been in from my colitis, has been very stressful. One of my weaknesses is that when I'm stressed, I'm very vulnerable to temptations.

One of my constant struggles is to be honest when things go wrong. I faced that challenge this morning, when feeling far too weak to deal with it.

I found a mistake on a data report. I was adding something to a sheet from over a week ago, and noticed that what was in the computer did not match up with what was on my data sheet. I typed in that a sample was run at a 10X dilution. My sheet - which is correct - said it was a 20X. So the client got sample results that were half of what they really were.

It's crazy to think that this could effect me as much as it did. But for some reason, these things always do. I had a moral decision to make at this point. I could ignore it and hope the client never realizes that something is wrong. If they do complain later that their data isn't what was expected, I could pretend I had not noticed it now. Or I could go to my boss, admit I made a mistake, and have them send out a corrected report.

It seems like such an easy decision. It should have been. But the terror I experience whenever I make a mistake just won't go away. I battled the temptation for a few minutes, and then realized that I am not my own. I can't afford to protect myself. The quality of the data is our company's reputation. More importantly, my honesty reflects upon my God. If I believe what I preach, I have to live it out even when it scares me.

I talked to my boss. He wasn't thrilled, but he wasn't mad either. You'd think by now I'd know this is what will happen.

I am so grateful for the work of the Holy Spirit in this. I'm fairly certain that a few years ago I would have taken the easy but dishonest way out.

I've been struggling with a colitis flare-up since Thursday afternoon. I made it through our home church meeting fine, things didn't get really bad until about midnight. But I've been pretty miserable ever since then.

I was trying to track what I could have done to bring this on. Usually it is easy to trace: I ate broccoli, or whole wheat. But on Wednesday, I had fasted until dinner. At dinner, I had macaroni hamburger helper - not something that causes me problems.

Part of the problem could certainly be my stress level. Ever since Wyatt left and I have taken over his methods, I have been pretty stressed out. Trying to keep up with everything has been a challenge, and doing new things in general makes me a bit anxious.

My doctor told me that fasting does tend to cause flare-ups in people with irritable bowel syndrome, so this could be part of my problem too. Apparently, when the colon sits empty for a bit, putting food into it again causes irritation. So she suggested I try an alternative to my fasting.

I want to keep up this discipline, but like diabetics, I am just going to have to adjust it to fit my health needs. After all, suffering for no reason at all is not pious, just foolish. And if I fast and as a result incapacitate myself for a week, I'm not benefiting God's Kingdom at all!

So, on my fasting days, I will eat, but only a predetermined food, like maybe toast or oatmeal. The doctor said oatmeal would be best, because the fiber would help.

In the meantime, I'm still recovering, and living on toast, jell-o, and mashed potatoes. I have to confess, I have done precious little Bible study since this flare up started. I can hardly think straight, because I'm in so much pain. I have been praying, but it is sporadic, and brief. And sadly, much of my prayers have consisting of begging for relief. I hate being this self focused.

I worked on Friday, and went to our block party at Debra Heights on Saturday, and that activity didn't help me recover. I don't think it made it worse though. I stayed home all day Sunday and barely moved, but there was still no improvement. I tried to work today, but after going to the doctor, I gave up. I was in too much pain, and I was running a fever. My white blood cell count was normal, so the fever is most likely a sign that I may be getting dehydrated, and exhausted.

Whenever I stay home from church or work, I am plagued with guilt. I have always fought the belief that I'm lazy, or a hypochondriac. Whenever I'm sick, I assume I'm really faking it. It takes extreme symptoms like this for me to accept that an illness is real. All day yesterday, I felt horrible for missing church. I know logically that staying home was the right thing to do. I probably should have stayed home Friday and Saturday. I am fighting the same guilt today, because I missed half a day at the lab.

I know that this is not logical at all. I know that God wants me to take care of this body that He has given me. I know He isn't a merciless task master, driving me to perform when I clearly can't. Yet because of my messed up perceptions, I have felt ashamed and separated from Him for the past few days.

I want to live out what we talked about Thursday night. I really do want to abide in Christ. I want Him to be first in my life all the time. It is hard enough to do this when life is full, and I'm working at top speed trying to catch up. For some reason, it is even harder for me when I'm sick.

It would make sense if I could say it is because I feel He has abandoned me by letting me suffer, but that isn't it at all. Instead, I feel shame for being sick. I assume it is because I did something stupid to bring it on, or that I'm faking in order to crawl under the covers and avoid life. I know this isn't the truth, yet still it is how I feel. Even a diagnosis can't take away the certainty that I'm just plain stupid, lazy, or both.

This deep rooted shame makes me want to hide from God. It isn't the smartest response, I know. Those times are when I need Him most. So I'm trying to break out of this pattern. I'm trying to pray, trying to still listen to my scripture podcasts, trying to read when I can focus. I can't afford to separate myself from Him now. I'm too weak and vulnerable. He is the source of my life, especially when I have nothing left in myself.

I wish it was always easy to live what I believe. I wish my intellectual understanding of the situation could easily overcome my gut level reactions. I wish I was always strong and healthy. But it is during these times that my faith grows, and I learn to be more dependent on Him. Lord Jesus, help me to cling to You when I need You most!

And hopefully my new meds will work quickly and I can get back to my normal self in a day or two.

I can do all things through Christ, who gives me strength.

I feel overwhelmed. There are times that starting a new church seems as natural as breathing. God created me to be a pastor. I have confidence in my skills, and in my God. But at other times, I’m pretty sure I’m insane for even trying such a thing.

I have been a pastor since 1997, and though I have loved it, it also brought much pain. I know how fulfilling ministry can be, and I know how hard it can be.

I have seen God move, and people saved. I have watched lives be transformed. I also sat by helpless and heartbroken as a church closed its doors. I have faced the unexplainable problem of silence from Heaven in the midst of deep pain.

Starting a church from scratch is terrifying. Right now we have 12 wonderful people who love the Lord. Our mission is simple: grow deeper in our love for and dependence on Jesus, and help others to know His saving grace for themselves. This is what I live my life for. Now there are others living this way along side me. It is wonderful.

But the responsibility is terrifying. Am I any where good enough to fill the role handed me? Absolutely not. I have never been perfect, and I never will be. I made some royal messes in my churches in the past, and I am aware of the likelihood of making brand new messes.

I am also not smart enough to pull this off. I may have a basic idea of planning, organizing and vision. But I’m not very charismatic. I have never been great at getting people to follow my plans.

Money is always an issue. My precious church in Clarinda closed because of a lack of funding. We prayed in faith, but still we closed. It is scary to step out a second time, and trust that this time will be different.

I live with a deep fear that God may let me fail again. And if that happens, what will I have left? Will I ever be able to be a pastor again, if this venture doesn’t pan out?

There are plenty of other fears and doubts. What will I do when conflict (which is an inevitable part of life) arises? Will I have the necessary wisdom to handle it? Will I know what to do, at the right time, to balance growth with spiritual formation? Do I have the intelligence to navigate a capitol campaign and a building project? Am I in over my head?

Absolutely, I am. And I wouldn’t have it any other way. If all this was something I could do in myself, I would do it myself. I would build my own little kingdom, proudly demonstrating to the world how amazing I am. And it would all be worthless.

But in this, I have nothing except a desire, and the realization that Jesus is building His church. It may be scary at times, and I’m sure it will get messy. But this is His project, and He is allowing me to join in.

I am committing to daily prayer, not only for my own spiritual needs, but for the direction of this church. Every aspect, from what songs to play, what scriptures to discuss, to what to have for dinner that night, I am bringing to Him. I am trusting that He will guide me. When problems do arise, my plan is to pray, and fast, and pray some more. Then I will do whatever He leads me to do, even if it scares me half to death.

I am planning to fast every Wednesday. This is in part because I know that my appetite tends to control me, and I want to be controlled only by God. It is also in part because I believe that God moves when we pray and fast.

Years ago, I read a biography of Louise Chapman, a Nazarene missionary. Whenever they would have evangelical meetings, she committed herself to pray and fast. She refused to eat until she saw God moving, and lives being changed.

I don’t have this discipline. But in her life, I don’t think discipline was the issue. Passion was. She had a very deep sense of what was at stake. She did not want to see anyone lost for eternity. In her mind, a few days of hunger pangs was well worth it, if even one soul was plucked from the clutches of hell.

Lord, fill me with your Spirit. I am desperate for You. Give me Your vision, Your wisdom, and Your love. I can’t do this without You.

Being Transformed

Romans 12:1-2And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice—the kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him. ² Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.

New Living Translation

Jesus has done so much for me. He loved me when I felt unlovable. He healed my broken spirit. He has given me a life worth living. As Paul said in this passage, surely when I think of all He has done for me, it isn't too much to ask for me to live for Him. But really...what does that mean? It sounds so nice, to say that I am offering my life to Jesus. But on a practical level, how do I go about doing that?

Paul suggests that part of this means letting God determine my values. Society and my own desires want to dictate how I live. But this was what caused my downfall to begin with. My original state was one of self indulgence and self preservation. I did what felt good, and what seemed safe. This opened doors for immoral behavior and deception. Along with it came guilt and shame.

God's will is that I be pure, and holy. There is no room for moral compromise. There is real freedom in knowing that even if things are unpleasant, if I have been sincere and faithful, I don't have to live with a fear of exposure. God's way is always best. My way leads to secrets, shame, and fear.

But when the pressure is on, I am so weak. Instinct seems to drive me to sinful responses. Or...I should say it used to do so. That has been changing. God is working.

Because of His grace and love, I want to offer my life to Him. Because of this, I have confessed my weaknesses and failures, and asked for His help in changing. He has faithfully helped me to change, by actually changing how I think. When under stress, I notice two responses. The first is my natural, sinful reaction, that leads to trouble. The second is God's way for me to react. And I get to choose which one I act on.

I will admit, too often I choose poorly. But more and more, I'm finding I can't live with that choice. Before hardly any time at all passes, I'm pleading for forgiveness and a chance for a "do-over." And even better, I'm making the right choice more frequently.

Transformation is not easy, or comfortable. It isn't something I can do by myself. But it is something I can ask for. After that, my task is to cooperate as God performs a truly awesome miracle - changing the way I think!

The Church in the Book of Acts

The Promise of the Holy Spirit

1 In my first book I told you, Theophilus, about everything Jesus began to do and teach ² until the day he was taken up to heaven after giving his chosen apostles further instructions through the Holy Spirit. ³ During the forty days after his crucifixion, he appeared to the apostles from time to time, and he proved to them in many ways that he was actually alive. And he talked to them about the Kingdom of God.

⁴ Once when he was eating with them, he commanded them, “Do not leave Jerusalem until the Father sends you the gift he promised, as I told you before. ⁵ John baptized with water, but in just a few days you will be baptized with the Holy Spirit.”

Acts 1:1-5, New Living Translation

I have succeeded in meeting my goal of reading through the Bible in 3 months. It was difficult some days, and if I missed even one day, it was hard to catch up. But it did give me a chance to see the scriptures more as a whole, instead of piece by piece. Next, I have decided that since I'm about to embark on the adventure of starting a new church, it would be a good idea to read through how the Church as a whole started. I'm going to study the book of Acts.

There are a couple important points in the first 5 verses of the book. We are told that for 40 days after Jesus rose from the dead, Jesus appeared to the apostles , and proved in many ways that He was alive. How incredible that must have been! They were most certainly traumatized by the experience of watching Jesus be tortured and killed. The reality of His death was beyond any doubt. I am sure it would have been tempting to think that they were victims of mass hysteria, or that they were seeing a ghost.

Jesus wanted to remove all traces of doubt. He ate in their presence. Ghosts don't eat. They were able to touch Him. You can't touch a spirit. It seemed impossible, but it was true - Jesus was indeed alive!

I am a bit jealous of these early Christians. I would have hated watching Jesus suffer, but I would give almost anything to actually see Jesus with my eyes, hear His voice with my ears, actually reach out and touch His hands. I have to confess, it is harder to believe without this physical, tangible evidence. I long for that confirmation. Yet I believe, based on the testimony of those who did see and hear and touch.

Paul writes in 1 Corinthians 15:3-8:

³ I passed on to you what was most important and what had also been passed on to me. Christ died for our sins, just as the Scriptures said. ⁴ He was buried, and he was raised from the dead on the third day, just as the Scriptures said. ⁵ He was seen by Peter and then by the Twelve. ⁶ After that, he was seen by more than 500 of his followers at one time, most of whom are still alive, though some have died. ⁷ Then he was seen by James and later by all the apostles. ⁸ Last of all, as though I had been born at the wrong time, I also saw him.

This is pretty compelling evidence. I'm sure that if we were in a court trial today, and there were over 500 witnesses all saying the same thing, we would consider that to be overwhelming evidence. Many of these witnesses were so convinced of what they saw, they were willing to die for the sake of their testimony. They knew Jesus was alive, and no matter what happened to them, they could not deny it.

In the church today, do we still have tangible evidence of Jesus's divinity, and of His work on Calvary? Are we just to depend on the testimony of hundreds of witnesses who lived so long ago, we are tempted to count their stories as irrelevant to our world today?

I suppose the best answer to this question is hinted at in the next few verses. Jesus commanded His followers to stay in Jerusalem until the Father sends them the gift He had promised them. They were about to be baptized with the Holy Spirit.

This meant that they were not merely going to see Jesus, talk with Him, or touch Him. They were actually going to live with Him in a new way. His own Spirit was going to dwell in them, filling them, giving them power. His Spirit would teach and guide them, and give them all they need in order to accomplish His will.

With this baptism, the proof of Jesus's resurrection moved from being an objective truth to a subjective experience. He was indeed alive, and He was actually with them in a very intimate way. He was with each and every one of them in that same way. This is something that went far beyond their wildest imagination. As a man, Jesus could only be in one place at any given time, and could only give His undivided attention to one person at a time. He may have been divine, but He was after all still human.

But this was different with the Holy Spirit. The Spirit can be with an infinite number of people, giving each one intense, undivided attention.

Of course, the Holy Spirit is not quite as tangible. The reality of His presence can't be denied. But rarely does He speak in an audible voice. Rarely if ever can He be seen or touched. And perhaps because I'm too much like doubting Thomas, I long for something I can experience with my senses, something I can examine, define, and prove that it exists scientifically.

But really, the gift of the Holy Spirit is exactly what we need. Everyone in the church can have a vibrant, life-changing experience with God. He is always there. I wonder how much more effective I would be if I would stop looking for proof, and just accept His presence as a reality, and be willing to submit to it.

I keep waiting for some kind of sign, to show me He's here. I want the tongues of fire dancing on my head, or I want the building to shake. If no such sign is given, does that mean He isn't with me? Of course not!

Perhaps the greatest sign of His presence is hinted at by the use of the word baptize. We are baptized with the Holy Spirit. Baptism was a symbolic washing, a demonstration of our cleansing through repentance. But water baptism can only touch the outside of a person. It doesn't penetrate into the body, making its way through all the tissues until it finds the heart. And even if it could do that, it couldn't actually wash away anyone's sins. They aren't physical clumps of dirt that can be effected by soap and water.

The sins are cleansed not by the water of baptism, but by the blood of Jesus. The water baptism is a way for us to engage our senses in the reality of our salvation. But this new baptism, a baptism with the Holy Spirit - this went beyond symbolism. It was in itself a wonderful act of grace. The cleansing that was only symbolic in water baptism becomes a reality with the baptism of the Holy Spirit. As promises several times in the Old Testament, our hearts are actually cleansed and renewed.

Yes, I still sin. But because of the work of the Holy Spirit, I no longer want to sin. When I blow it, I ache. I can't stand it, I have to go to Him for restoration. My attitudes, desires, and as a consequence my actions are all changing because of the work of the Holy Spirit in my life.

I have never heard the voice of Jesus with my ears. I have never reached out and touched Him with my fingers. I have never looked into His eyes. But I have felt the wonderful effects of being baptized by the Holy Spirit. I long for even more of His Spirit, more of His presence.

This is the hope that is offered to any church. We don't have to go it alone. It isn't about programs. It's not about our own efforts. We don't have to struggle to do everything right. What we need is for Him to fill us with His Spirit. Come, Lord Jesus!

Tearing Through Roofs

Luke 5:17-26

17 One day while Jesus was teaching, some Pharisees and teachers of religious law were sitting nearby. (It seemed that these men showed up from every village in all Galilee and Judea, as well as from Jerusalem.) And the Lord’s healing power was strongly with Jesus.

18 Some men came carrying a paralyzed man on a sleeping mat. They tried to take him inside to Jesus, 19 but they couldn’t reach him because of the crowd. So they went up to the roof and took off some tiles. Then they lowered the sick man on his mat down into the crowd, right in front of Jesus. 20 Seeing their faith, Jesus said to the man, “Young man, your sins are forgiven.”

21 But the Pharisees and teachers of religious law said to themselves, “Who does he think he is? That’s blasphemy! Only God can forgive sins!”

22 Jesus knew what they were thinking, so he asked them, “Why do you question this in your hearts? 23 Is it easier to say ‘Your sins are forgiven,’ or ‘Stand up and walk’? 24 So I will prove to you that the Son of Man has the authority on earth to forgive sins.” Then Jesus turned to the paralyzed man and said, “Stand up, pick up your mat, and go home!”

25 And immediately, as everyone watched, the man jumped up, picked up his mat, and went home praising God. 26 Everyone was gripped with great wonder and awe, and they praised God, exclaiming, “We have seen amazing things today!”

New Living Translation

Look at how far these friends went to see their friend healed. They sacrificed their time, to carry him to where Jesus was. And when they saw that there were too many people in front of them for their friend to see Jesus, they did not give up. Instead, they did something incredibly risky. They climbed up on the roof, and began to tear it open.

I'm sure that homeowners in those days were no more likely to be thrilled at having someone rip off their roof than today's homeowners would be. In fact, these men would have known that according to Jewish rules, they would have to reimburse the home's owner not only for the roof, but for three times it's value! They didn't just act rashly, they knew that what they were doing was going to cost them. But if their friend would be healed, it would be worth it all!

It makes me wonder, how much am I willing to risk to see my friends be touched by Jesus? Is it worth giving up my time, or my resources? Am I willing to put my reputation on the line in order to see someone be saved? Lord, give me a passion for the lost souls all around me!

Jesus is willing

Luke 5:12-13

12 In one of the villages, Jesus met a man with an advanced case of leprosy. When the man saw Jesus, he bowed with his face to the ground, begging to be healed. “Lord,” he said, “if you are willing, you can heal me and make me clean.”

13 Jesus reached out and touched him. “I am willing,” he said. “Be healed!” And instantly the leprosy disappeared.

New Living Translation

Leprosy was one of the most feared diseases of Jesus's day. Not only did it do terrible damage to the body, it also took a huge toll on a person's psychological health. A leper was unclean. They had to stay outside of the towns, and cry out in a loud voice "Unclean!" whenever there were people around. The shame, and the isolation, would surely take a huge toll on even the most secure individuals.

We don't know how long the man in this story had been suffering with the disease, but we do know that his case was an advanced one. He had most likely been sick for a very long time. As a result, he would have had almost no human contact for a long time. He was desperate.

He was also humble. I love the way he approaches Jesus. He didn't shout, or throw a tantrum. He simply bowed before Jesus, acknowledging His authority and His grace, and said, "If You are willing, You can make me clean."

His actions were full of worship, and submission. It is true that he was begging for mercy, pleading for healing. But he made no demands. He knew he had no right to insist that Jesus do anything. But He did know that Jesus was full of mercy and kindness. So knowing he had no right to anything at all, he humbled himself and asked.

And Jesus's response was so kind and gracious. He said "I am willing," and the man was healed.

No matter how sick we are today, no matter how sinful and how deep our shame is, we too can bow before Jesus and ask for mercy. And His response is the same today as it was two thousand years ago. He is willing. His love and mercy are available to us today, if we will worship Him in humility and submission.

God's Protection

Psalm 18:30-36

30 God’s way is perfect.

All the Lord’s promises prove true.

He is a shield for all who look to him for protection.

31 For who is God except the Lord?

Who but our God is a solid rock?

32 God arms me with strength,

and he makes my way perfect.

33 He makes me as surefooted as a deer,

enabling me to stand on mountain heights.

34 He trains my hands for battle;

he strengthens my arm to draw a bronze bow.

35 You have given me your shield of victory.

Your right hand supports me;

your help has made me great.

36 You have made a wide path for my feet

to keep them from slipping.

New Living Translation

I am grateful for the many blessings of God. His grace, mercy, and love are amazing. I am in awe of the lengths He went through to ensure not only my salvation, but also my cleansing.

But on a practical basis, the one thing I crave most from God is protection. I have lived most of my life feeling vulnerable and afraid. As a young child, I faced far too many evil situations without a human protector. I grew up doubting that God really protects me. After all, if He was protecting me, it appears He did not do a very good job.

The problem was in my understanding of protection. I have defined it as being kept from all negative situations. As a parent, I have done my best to make sure that nothing bad happens to my children. Of course, I am human, and can't control the universe. God can. So why didn't He stop bad things from happening to me, when I was so young and innocent?

I am not sure I am smart enough to answer this question. If I could, I would be God; I am not. He alone knows why He allows things to happen. He knows all, and owes me no explanation. But still, this leaves me with a desperate need for security, for a protection I know I can always count on.

I am not a child any more. Those situations that appeared unbearable really were not. I did survive. It has taken years of therapy and healing, but the end result is that I am stronger, wiser, and more compassionate than I would have been if I had not lived through such trauma.

And as an adult, I can see that God was protecting me, and still is. His protection does not mean preventing pain. Instead, it is a promise that these things that hurt so much will not destroy me.

In this Psalm, we are given a simple outline of how God protects us.

He gives us strength to endure what we must endure (vs. 32). He won't let us go through more than we can cope with, through His strength. Of course, if we attempt to deal with our crisis situations in our own strength, we are in serious trouble. But if we turn to Him for help, He will always get us through.

He guides our steps, even when the ground is uneven and we are unsure (vs. 33). We often think that if we follow God, everything will work out nicely. But that is not always the case - at least not at first. Moses obeyed God and told Pharaoh to let the Israelites go free. Instead, Pharaoh oppressed the people even more. Paul obeyed the Spirit and went to Jerusalem. He was then thrown into a Roman prison. Jesus was led by the Holy Spirit to the wilderness, where He fasted and prayed for 40 days. After that act of obedience, He faced a terrible trial of temptation.

Obeying God doesn't always mean happiness, prosperity and luxury. Sometimes it brings pain and persecution. And in the midst of that we can be tempted to believe that either we made a mistake in interpreting God's will, or God has abandoned us.

The truth is, we are in a spiritual war, and following God puts us on the front lines. In the end, though, God gets us through. It was true for Moses - the Israelites were freed from slavery, and they plundered Egypt in the process. It was true for Paul - though he was in prison, he was full of joy and peace, and he continued to spread the gospel all over the globe. And it was true for Jesus - He resisted the temptation to sin, and lived a sinless life. He eventually faced an even greater trial - crucifixion. He endured this, and in the process provided the means of salvation for all who will believe.

We are told in Proverbs 3:5-6: Trust in the Lord with all your heart;

do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.

If we seek His will, with the intent of obeying no matter what, He will guide us. If the path is a difficult one, He will walk it with us, and make sure we make it to then end.

Another aspect of God's protection is that everything we face in life is a preparation for what is to come (vs. 34). There is nothing wasted. Without my previous experience, I wouldn’t have the strength to deal with the challenges I have to deal with now. And what I am going through now will help prepare me for what is to come. It is like a training program for an athlete.

And these experiences not only help me, they help other people. Because of what I have gone through, I can offer compassion, love, support, and hope to others who are hurting.

And finally, God promises that if we will trust Him and endure, we will win the victory (vs. 35). He will support us, and in the end we will see amazing things come out of the deepest struggles.

Being cleansed is better than being disciplined.

Colossians 2:2023

You have died with Christ, and he has set you free from the spiritual powers of this world. So why do you keep on following the rules of the world, such as, 21 “Don’t handle! Don’t taste! Don’t touch!”? Such rules are mere human teachings about things that deteriorate as we use them. These rules may seem wise because they require strong devotion, pious self-denial, and severe bodily discipline. But they provide no help in conquering a person’s evil desires.

New Living Translation

When Paul wrote this, he was not saying that we should throw all self-discipline out the window. He was a very disciplined man himself, at one point saying that he daily brought his body into submission so when this race of life is over, he wouldn't find himself disqualified for the prize.

Instead, Paul is combating a religious idea that was gaining acceptance in the early church. This was the notion that though you were saved through faith, more was needed. You not only had to be good from now on, but you had to be SUPER good! This concept is called asceticism. It led to extreme practices such as climbing up stone steps on one's knees, to self-flagellation.

Paul's point was very clear. These extreme behaviors will do you no good. In fact, they may harm your spirit instead of help. The reason is that if you are going to such extremes to be accepted by Christ, you have gotten your eyes off of Christ, and are once again firmly focused on yourself and your own efforts. And the whole point of turning to Christ for salvation is that we cannot save ourselves.

So how do we practice self-discipline in a way that is Godly, and not mere self-idolatry? The first step is to realize that no amount of self-control will ever change our desires.

Have you ever gone on a diet? If so, I bet that your efforts at controlling what you eat did not in any way change your appetite. In fact if you are like most dieters, it made you want your delicious treats even more than you did before you began the diet. This illustrates a frustrating truth - self-denial tends to magnify the desires we are trying to control, not squelch them.

The only answer is in Jesus. He promises that when we turn our lives over to Him, He will change us from the inside out. We saw this in yesterday's passage. When we exercise discipline in conjunction with the cleansing work of the Holy Spirit (as Paul did), then discipline becomes our ally, not our downfall.

We can be changed from the inside out

Colossians 2:11-15

When you came to Christ, you were “circumcised,” but not by a physical procedure. Christ performed a spiritual circumcision—the cutting away of your sinful nature. For you were buried with Christ when you were baptized. And with him you were raised to new life because you trusted the mighty power of God, who raised Christ from the dead.

You were dead because of your sins and because your sinful nature was not yet cut away. Then God made you alive with Christ, for he forgave all our sins. He canceled the record of the charges against us and took it away by nailing it to the cross. In this way, he disarmed the spiritual rulers and authorities. He shamed them publicly by his victory over them on the cross.

New Living Translation

The promises we have in Jesus are far greater than merely being let off the hook for the bad things we've done. Being forgiven for doing something terrible is a great thing, and of course God does that.

But this is no mere pat on the head, telling us it is ok, even though it really isn't. God is just, and sin requires punishment. Jesus took that punishment in full, as He was nailed to the cross. Justice is fulfilled, and we are free of any further condemnation.

Our enemy's name, "Satan", means the accuser. He would like nothing more than to remind us of our shame. But when Jesus died and rose again, He shamed Satan instead. The devil can no longer accuse us of anything before God. The Accuser has no power over us any longer.

In addition to all this, there is another awesome benefit to Christ's salvation offer. He actually changes us from the inside out.

A criminal's penalty could be paid for, but who is to say that once he is released he won't commit another, possibly worse, crime? Sadly this happens all too frequently, as dangerous criminals are released from our prisons.

Being set free, being forgiven, does not mean that we will change. We could be set free to repeat our offenses.

But the gift of God through faith in Jesus goes deeper than forgiveness. The sinful nature, that deep down drive toward sin that compels us to do things we know we should not do, is cut out. I have seen it happen in an instant, and I have seen it happen over a period of time. But one thing is certain - if you have truly accepted Jesus as Your Lord and Savior, it WILL happen! The best thing we can do is to anticipate it, ask for it, and cooperate with the work of the Holy Spirit as He gives us the miracle of new life.

Build your life on Jesus

Colossians 2:6-7

And now, just as you accepted Christ Jesus as your Lord, you must continue to follow him. Let your roots grow down into him, and let your lives be built on him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness.

New Living Translation

There are many times when my husband Keith and I could finish each other's sentences. We've spent so much time together, we know how the other thinks. He has taught me to love Star Trek, and I've helped him learn to enjoy having cats in the house. (He still prefers dogs, but I'm working on it!)

Many years ago when we were first married, we came from separate lives. After a few years, our different backgrounds merged into a new creation, a life that is a blend of the best of both of us.

This is a result of spending many hours together, talking about everything, sharing dreams and fears, and experiencing new things together. Our love for and devotion to each other has grown stronger as a result.

This is similar to how our relationship with Jesus grows. Coming to know Jesus is an awesome thing, but it is only a beginning. We need to spend time with Him in prayer, reading His word, and thinking about Him. As we spend time with Him, He reveals Himself more and more. And the result is a deeper, stronger relationship with Him.

The goal is that we will grow so devoted to Jesus that we will have Him as the foundation of our life. We will do what pleases Him, not what pleases ourselves. We will avoid doing things that we know will displease Him. All we do, we will do with Him in mind.

And the better we know Him, the more we will trust Him. We will have a better understanding of all He has done for us, and all He is going to do. The result will be a deepening of thankfulness, joy, and peace.

Surely all this is worth spending time in prayer and Bible reading!

Jesus is all we need!

Colossians 2:1-5

I want you to know how much I have agonized for you and for the church at Laodicea, and for many other believers who have never met me personally. 2 I want them to be encouraged and knit together by strong ties of love. I want them to have complete confidence that they understand God’s mysterious plan, which is Christ himself. 3 In him lie hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge.

4 I am telling you this so no one will deceive you with well-crafted arguments. 5 For though I am far away from you, my heart is with you. And I rejoice that you are living as you should and that your faith in Christ is strong.

New Living Translation

One of the problems plaguing the early church was gnosticism. This belief taught in part that there was some special, secret knowledge required to be saved. This meant that only the elite, those who were "enlightened", were saved.

In this passage, Paul is clearly stating that the "mysterious plan," the secret knowledge needed to be saved is in fact Jesus Himself. If you know Him, you are saved. It is that simple. You don't have to know some secret fact or special formula. You don't have to have some strange insight. You just need to know Jesus. In Him lie all wisdom and knowledge.

Knowing Jesus is not some weird, unattainable concept. Who He is was revealed in Scripture. If when you hear about Him and what He did, you believe it and accept it, then you are saved.

Paul warned the people in his day not to be fooled by well-crafted arguments. We should heed the same warning today. Mysticism, spiritism, and all of the false religions of today won't save us. It is as simple today as it was in the days of the early church. Believe in Jesus, and follow Him. Don't look for some secret knowledge, just look for Jesus. He is all that any of us needs.

Colossians 1:24-29

24 I am glad when I suffer for you in my body, for I am participating in the sufferings of Christ that continue for his body, the church. 25 God has given me the responsibility of serving his church by proclaiming his entire message to you. 26 This message was kept secret for centuries and generations past, but now it has been revealed to God’s people. 27 For God wanted them to know that the riches and glory of Christ are for you Gentiles, too. And this is the secret: Christ lives in you. This gives you assurance of sharing his glory.

28 So we tell others about Christ, warning everyone and teaching everyone with all the wisdom God has given us. We want to present them to God, perfect in their relationship to Christ. 29 That’s why I work and struggle so hard, depending on Christ’s mighty power that works within me.

New Living Translation

There was a problem in the early church in the city of Colosse. There was a false doctrine similar to gnosticism that was being taught. In a nutshell, this is a believe that there is a secret knowledge required to be saved. Only a few "special" enlightened people will be able to find this knowledge.

Paul wrote this letter to the Colossians in large part to set the people straight. In doing so, he uses some of the same language the Gnostic's were using.

In verse 26, he says that the message of salvation was kept secret for centuries. But now it has been revealed to His own holy people. What Paul is saying is not that this was a secret message that can only be figured out by an elite few. Instead it was hidden until Christ came. After He came, the message is being boldly told, in its entirety, to anyone willing to listen and accept it.

And just what is this message, that Paul is suffering so much for in order to make sure it is known? It is that Christ lives in all who will believe that Jesus is indeed God, and that He died for our sins in order to save us. This is what Paul said earlier in this chapter. The truth is, if you believe, it does not matter who you are, you are saved and you have the Holy Spirit given to you.

You don't have to be smart, or gifted. You don't have to be a preacher, or a prophet. You don't have to be a certain race, or sex. You don't have to look any special way, or have a specific lifestyle, other than submission to the lordship of Jesus.

There is no secret password, no magical initiation, nothing that has to be done in order to earn the salvation offered by Christ. Simply believe. Then live like it, through the power of His Spirit within you.